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What is shyness? Its manifestations and consequences

For most of us, shyness is a sign of something very sweet, kind, even plush. In our eyes, a shy person automatically becomes either a knight or a princess. But in reality, everything is far from being so cute when it comes to oneself, right? After all, to be completely honest, shyness is the same self-doubt, just a side view, and it sends life very much, starting from childhood. There isn’t enough courage to answer the teacher’s question, even if you know the lesson perfectly well, you’re afraid to get to know a new person – in the end, you come to the conclusion that the best solution to the problem is invisibility, some invisibility among society. The purpose of this article is to help many of us go out and finally lose our invisibility cloak and understand how to learn to love and respect ourselves.
Everything reaches me pretty slowly, but I’m embarrassed when something doesn’t work with strangers, and then it completely stops working, and I’m embarrassed even more … © Max Fry

What is shyness? Its manifestations and consequences
shyness
Drawing on the writings of a renowned British psychologist, Raymond Cattel, who devoted much of his work to overcoming shyness. By his definition, shyness, in the first place, is an unstable state of the psyche of both a person and an animal, provoked by a violation in the brain of neurotransmitters. The result of such a violation is the appearance of fear, as well as awkwardness in communicating with people, being in society.

To date, psychologists have proposed two types of human shyness:

Embarrassment in front of the public is that category of people who is not afraid to seem ridiculous or absurd in front of other people. The only main condition is with these people, they should be at least in friendly relations. However, despite the seemingly pronounced manifestation of shame, such a command model is the norm, since the desire to please strangers is a natural human desire.
Shyness in front of oneself is the main distinguishing feature of such people – it’s almost impossible to say right away that a person is humble. Among friends, he can be considered the first jovial and ringleader. In reality, all of his emotions, his behavior is nothing more than a game, a mask behind which real emotions are hidden. People who fall under such a type very quickly “burn out” emotionally. This is because playing in public requires a lot of energy, it is very difficult for them to learn to love and respect themselves. Simply put, it is very difficult for such people to raise their real level of self-esteem. Playing in public is a kind of protective mechanism that prevents others from seeing the true nature of such people.
It should be noted that it is also possible to understand whether a person is embarrassed by external signs. Many face redness (from a pretty blush on the cheeks to crimson spots that cover not only the face, but also the ears), there is a change in the timbre of the voice (for example, a person can speak sharply a few octaves higher than before), eye movement, stiffness postures and other movements. All of these symptoms can occur either individually or together, depending on the degree of embarrassment.
It would seem that such a terrible thing is that some people cannot show the whole spectrum of their own emotions, however, as practice shows, this is far from harmless. Concealment of our own reaction to factors that disturb us can result in a whole series of problems that will haunt us throughout life, while their most minimal manifestations will be:
The impossibility of self-realization – any development, regardless of its direction, requires self-confidence, own strengths and skills. A shy person, unfortunately, cannot boast of such a thing, which leads to a protracted period of “preserving” himself as a person on all life fronts.
Constant guilt – shyness in abnormal amounts, is also dangerous because the person to whom it is inherent experiences guilt for everything that he did or did not do. Simply put – is engaged in self-discipline with and without. Such constant internal tension will soon have all chances to develop into a pronounced psychosis, with very deplorable consequences in adulthood.
Forced introvert – shyness – this is not a synonym for isolation, as well as unwillingness to be in the company of other people. It’s just that such people need a little more time to open themselves to the rest. Have you seen such shyness in children? At first, you’re afraid to even look at you, hiding behind your parents, but after half an hour of good nature and sincere attention, you automatically become your own. They want to play with you, laugh, and when it comes time to leave, they don’t want to let go. Yes, the example is primitive, but adults, if we discard daily worries, are still the same children.

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