In fact, nothing happens. Many often confuse the cause and the cause of the conflict.
Really, any “trifle” can become a reason – he did not call from work, which is delayed, although there was no thought in his thoughts and hiding. Or she did not prepare dinner for his arrival, although she promised. He is unhappy that she “as luck would have” wore his unloved dress on the corporate party. She is indignant at the fact that he vowed many times to fix the crane, and did not. You can continue for a long time.
Anyone can say: “Well, nothing happened! No one betrayed, didn’t change, didn’t leave, didn’t set up …. “Yes, that’s it. But let’s look not at a reason, but at a reason. Continue reading
Sometimes the stories of couples who are on the verge of a divorce begin with proud words – “we lived in perfect harmony for two years and never quarreled, but then, unexpectedly …”. Those who are alone tormented by doubts about the future also touch on this topic: “we have continuous family conflicts, perhaps the only way out is to leave.”
And there are completely radical options: as soon as a semblance of a quarrel arises, one of the couple is ready to immediately slam the door and leave. Sometimes forever. Without trying to resolve conflicts in a relationship. Because in the minds of many quarrels are something that should not be in family life, otherwise it cannot be considered either “successful”, “successful” or even “normal”. The popular picture of the constantly pouring molasses on both sides, it turns out, is terribly tenacious. And alas, it is very destructive.
There is another extreme. When people don’t even wonder “how to build a dialogue?” When they resigned themselves to swearing. Such couples are already tired of posing as a happy family, and now Continue reading
Karl Whitaker will remain in the history of family therapy one of her most “avant-garde” classics: brilliant and controversial, sometimes shockingly harsh, prone to mysterious aphorisms that have been interpreted and borrowed for many years. In this book, the reader will find specific working methods, vivid cases from practice and, more importantly, ideas that help to better understand not only their clients, but also their own professional and family history.
The book is addressed to everyone who in their work is connected with family issues: consultants, school and clinical psychologists and, of course, psychotherapists.
IN THE MIDNIGHT Flicker Continue reading